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Save the chickens! Paris Hilton will deliver them from evil! Those crazy folks from People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) have written to Paris Hilton asking her to become the new face for chickens’ rights. Apparently Paris’ time behind bars is comparable to that of chickens spending their time in coops. I guess there are some similarities.

Now that Paris Hilton has found God she will need an army to lead, and that army may as well be a bunch of chickens. She will require a group of devotees on a similar intellectual plane.

“KFC – that’s not hot!” is the planned slogan for Paris Hilton’s chicken campaign.

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You think you’re invisible, that nobody notices you, that you just blend in with everyone else. But you’re not; you never are. Being a foreigner in Thailand, people see you, they observe they watch they ponder. You’re in their country; why wouldn’t they notice you? You stand out like a cat among dogs.

The way Thais view foreigners on a day to day basis is something I’ve been wondering about. Maybe there are excited discussions going on, or perhaps it’s with indifference that a community observes its new additions.

I walked the twenty or so meters from my apartment to my office, dropped off some work, and returned not ten minutes later. There, under my door, was a note from my next door neighbour. The tone was one of concern, inquiring if I was lonely and needed somebody to talk to, to show me around, to be my friend. The note was written in a green crayon and was somehow touching.

I neither recall ever seeing my next door neighbour nor telling him or her my name, but he or she has been aware of my presence, despite me thinking I was invisible.

Techno' tags: Life in Thailand

This really is a grim piece of news that instills little optimism. From today’s Bangkok Post:

A new video of kidnapped BBC journalist Alan Johnston shows him wearing an explosives vest and warning he will be blown up if Hamas continues to surround the area where he is being held, the US-based Intel Center said Sunday in an e-mail to news organisations.

The video was released by Jaish al-Islam (Army of Islam) of Gaza, the militant group that has been holding the journalist since March, the Intel Center said.

Only Johnston speaks on the video, which is entitled "Alan's Appeal," the Intel Center said.

According to a transcript of Johnston's remarks, the journalist says his captors "are ready to turn the hideout into what they describe as a death zone if there's an attempt to free me by force."

This situation is reaching boiling point. Hamas delivered an ultimatum that Johnston be released today or else gunmen will storm the location where he is being held. The threat by his captors is that if force is used, Johnston will be killed. It’s been more than three months since Johnston was kidnapped in Gaza City. Spare a though.

Techno' tags: Alan Johnston

You can’t pick up a copy of The Nation without reading a column about Thaksin. It’s like an unwritten rule that if there is nothing else to write about then columnists should revert back to taking a pop at Thailand’s ousted premier. On Saturday Veenarat Laohapakakul opened with this:

So the deposed prime minister of Thailand finally opted for an old trick he knew best in times of trouble, announcing that he was going to buy a football club.

Old, trick, old news. It’s been two months since Thaksin announced his plan to buy Manchester City. The column continued:

With their large fan base in Thailand, the former leader's earlier proposals to buy Liverpool and Fulham football clubs drew vast interest among the public. It proved to work well back then, but unfortunately for him it is not working as well in this latest attempt.

Just like the boy who cried wolf too often, Thaksin has been unable to attain the desired wow effect with his Manchester City announcement. We have seen these flashy headlines far too often to fall into his trap this time.

What isn’t working as well? Thaksin’s had his bid accepted. I’d say it’s working just fine. Has Thaksin really laid a trap? “It's just another story about a millionaire buying a team,” wrote Veenarat. Yes, it is. Quite right. So where’s the trap in that? Veenarat even went so far as to suggest that Thaksin should be forced to undergo a “psychiatric test” because “[Thaksin] said he had really quit politics but keeps threatening to come back.” He said he wasn’t going to come back, didn’t he? He certainly hasn’t threatened to get back into politics, no matter how much of his political influence he attempts to exert.

In Sunday’s The Nation Sopon Onkgara stepped up to say much the same thing as Veenarat, although he did it with a sprinkling of bewildering statements:

Thaksin has taken a new last name, something like "Sinatra" or "Shinatra" for reasons best known to himself. Maybe he wants to establish a new identity so that he can rub shoulders with the owners of other Premiership League clubs in London with reasonable composure and grace, if need be.

To fit with the last name, he should also change his first name to "Thaksino", which was what one of his political cronies called the brand of Thai fashion that he had wanted to promote abroad, but which failed within just a few months. Instead of being well known abroad, the crony became a laughingstock, which failed to amuse even Thaksin, who felt that his good name had not been used with due respect.

If this is what he decides on, being called "Thaksino Shinatra" does not sound too bad. At least nobody can rightly compare him with Idi Amin, the deceased leader of Uganda who was once chided by a group of British men for being a "village tyrant".

That’s three paragraphs wasted on silly jibes. Then came another one:

His tales of woe of being a victim of a Russian pickpocket a few weeks ago inside a Moscow McDonald's outlet is still a joke around town. He was made Bt1.5 million poorer. If a billionaire and former prime minister chose to enjoy junk food instead of Russian beluga caviar and other delicacies, it does show something about the level of his taste.

These petty insults really undermine any vague point Sopon might have been trying to make. “There is still a worrisome aspect,” wrote Sopon. “Mr. Bean, the top comedian, might have met his match this time when it comes to unpredictability.” That’s very Thai, bringing up Mr. Bean. I wouldn’t go so far as to say Mr. Bean was the top comedian, but comparing him to Thaksin must have raised a few laughs somewhere. Possibly.

As if things couldn’t get any more absurd, Sopon concluded with, “If the two eventually team up and work together, it could be the next phenomenon along the lines of the Beatles and the Spice Girls. It could eventually entice David Beckham to join Manchester City so that the good name of Victoria won't be tarnished by the joint team of Messrs Bean and Shinawatra, the real odd couple, East meets West, so to speak.”

Comparing Mr Bean to The Beatles and on to Victoria Beckham is ludicrous. Such tenuous links must confuse the hell out of readers. I am at a loss. I can’t help laughing at the queerness of this weekend’s editorials. What will tomorrow bring?

Techno' tags: Thailand, Thai media, Thaksin