And here we are, half past three in the morning, let’s roll another one
OK so it’s not half past three, but it’s still late and the idea of sleep seems a little way off as I’ve drunk far too much M150 tonight. Once again there aren’t enough hours in the day for me to get my work done and do anything else. I had a brief nap when I got home, but I’ve started realizing recently that I probably work more than I sleep. It’s good for getting money, but not so good for juggling a social schedule, eating, and my full-time job. Of course, I’m not complaining, my portfolio is going to be huge and I’m saving some $$$ which all helps. I just sometimes feel like I need a holiday, which I would be getting next week were it not for work.
I was in Koh Lanta last week, and while this was kind of a holiday, I still had to do a lot of work. Life seems quite positive at the moment for one reason or another, but what would happen if I left all of this behind? That’s a question I need to confront sooner rather than later. I’m beginning to feel re-settled after a period of confusion. What I’m most afraid of, however, is that I will just stay in Thailand forever, never leaving, living comfortably, but not really fulfilling my bigger goals. Ah, it would be so easy to stay here. There’s a lot of work, and networking is relatively simple, but how many more people would come and go, how many more times would I think I had my life made and then decide actually I don’t?
One thing that made me feel incredibly nostalgic, to the point of being almost in tears, was watching Rocky 6 last night. I’m a little ashamed to admit this, but it was such a great movie. Maybe you have to have seen the first five to really “get” it, but I thought Sylvester Stallone did such a stellar job. He really captured the essence of the first movie. I grew up watching Rocky. I’ve lost count of how many times I saw the movies as a child. Watching it again kind of made me think of home, of my childhood, of the people I’ve lost touch with, the people I still remember. Even people I haven’t seen for 15 years still play on my mind sometimes. What are they doing now? Do they remember the times we spent together doing the stupid things that children do?
Being seven-years-old, you think you’ve got life sussed. I remember that every time there was a school disco, to be one of the cool kids you had to wet your hair with water and then wear a cap. I played football every day. I woke up at 7 a.m. without an alarm clock and watched cartoons. If I had been bad I would write my Mum a letter apologizing. Having a Kinder egg was the greatest thing in the world. Times were simple, and back then I had a complete family. But things change and here I am a long way from home.
I wonder if they still remember me.
Techno' tags: Life, Rocky, Retrospection
Unless you're doing really well here, plan to stay long term and grow old here, or don't care about your future you really need to keep a check on where you're going. I know from experience (I was here for several years in the early nineties) that English teaching in Thailand counts for dick when you get back home. If your long term goal is returning home then just look at property prices and the cost of living – the longer you're out of the system the harder it will be to get back in.
I don't teach English though.
But wait, I see your point. It works on a few levels, for sure. The media scene here is pretty inconsistent as it's not a native country, so really I'm quite limited. Which is probably the main reason to go somewhere like Australia.
I respect people who could live here for ever, I'm coming upto 9 months and aspects of Thai life and business has started do to my head in.
Loe's right, Asia is still seen as that enchanted land back in Europe and the US, so experience here could be seen as you buggering around Asia when you get back.
Don't get me wrong, it's great to be able to pay models the same amount i normally did for 5 drinks in London or NYC and to have the beaches to shoot at.
Rocky 6 was good, left a tear in me eye it did
Yeah, sorry, I didn't mean to label you a teacher, I know you write a column for Guru but I thought I remember you writing something about teaching a few months ago.
Worth thinking seriously about anyway. Look around. Some foreigners have done well but there's a hell of a lot more who haven't. I wasted some years here in the nineties and it made it very hard for me when I went back. This time I'm here reluctantly (but not for much longer!!!) because of my wife's job.
You'll be accepted in Australia and if you stay you can make a life there, just the same as back home. That will never be the case here.
Is Rocky 6 really good??
I grew up watching alien…believe me its way more touching than Rocky.
Alien was great. Aliens was better.
@LOE
I only taught for a few months while I found other work. At the moment I work freelance for some magazines and full-time for an international company. If I stay here until the end of year, my prospects (and bonus) would be pretty sizable, but it's a long way off from here. Ah, what to do. I've drunk too much coffee today.
I'm remember you, still !!
There're loads of movies I need to watch, Rocky would be nice. I'm feeling like… I want to beat something. I'm lost, lonely and fear of getting old (it's my 28th Bday on 28th of March. probably half-life crisis or something) & etc..
And of course.. I'm missing home. Hope I can get through this.
Cheers