It’s been around 56 hours since I last had a cigarette, an LM Menthol. This is the start of my latest drive to quit smoking. Previous attempts have failed dismally. The problems are many: The nicotine cravings are quite real, the psychological habit is difficult to break and social situations are all very cigarette orientated. There have been two major tests so far. The first was at Café De Moc last night, a place at which I would usually smoke excessively. Although I got drunk, even more so than usual, I resisted all temptation. It was hard, but ultimately rather rewarding.

The downside was that I had to drink instead of smoke to keep myself occupied. I drank a lot. So much so that on the way home I told the taxi to take me down the wrong road and without wanting to lose face and look foolish I casually instructed him to stop and assured him I lived at a BTS Station a fifteen minute walk from my apartment. My girlfriend was a little miffed as she was waiting at home to let me in as I didn’t have a key.

I assured her it was the driver’s fault and then fell asleep.

Another test came today when I went downstairs with my boss to discuss some work related things. We had gone down for a ‘cigarette break,’ but I was prepared to watch her smoke and see how I got on. She offered me a cigarette and I declined. So far so good. My chest hurts and I am asthmatic. I used to play a lot of sports and run regularly. I even competed up until a couple of years back. Those days are sadly missed and I often dream of them at night.

My girlfriend pledged to quit smoking at the same time as I did. She lasted less than four hours.